Is Mark Zuckerberg Actually A Cybernetic Terminator Hell-Bent On Censorship And Political Genocide?

The motionless facial expressions, the monotone voice and the complete lack of any human emotion. Facebook creator and CEO Mark Zuckerberg is most definitely a cybernetic terminator sent from the year 2029 to infiltrate our data and privacy, then take… Continue Reading

Would He-Man Be Non-Binary in 2018?!

To many Generation Z Snapchatters and Tide Pod swallowers, He-Man is that biceped blonde guy in spandex pants dancing around with some guy in a skeleton costume in the MoneySuperMarket.com commercials, but long before that, He-Man was the very definition… Continue Reading

Aliens Could Wipe Out Humanity By Hacking Our Social Media Accounts

It was only a matter of time, but who would have thought that Snapchat could literally destroy the very essence of civilisation? Scientists have claimed that aliens could bring down society as we know it, by hacking our Facebook, Snapchat… Continue Reading

KFC Chicken Shortage Has Left The UK A Ravaged Wasteland

Do you smell that? No, it’s not the lingering and seductive smell of overly processed greasy fast-food chicken, it’s the rank smell of DEATH! The end of days is upon us and our civilisation has come to a crashing demise. Not exactly finger… Continue Reading

The Left-Wing Guide To Surviving a Nazi Zombie Apocalypse

In 2018, during these times of political unrest and social turmoil, it seems you can’t walk down the street or venture through your local friendly multicultural neighbourhood / deserted Jewish cemetery without potentially bumping into a Nazi Zombie. “They’re coming… Continue Reading

The Undiplomatic Guide to the 71 Genders on Facebook

Did you know that there are currently more gender options available on Facebook than there are countries in Europe (and that’s not including non E.U shit hole monstrosities like El Salvador and Haiti either, obviously) Though saying that, Sweden isn’t exactly… Continue Reading

A Legally Binding Contract Will Now Be Available Before Sex

In a society where cis-gender men are reported for sexual assault every 2.3 seconds a day for accidentally brushing past a woman, the age of practicality and common sense are all but a distant memory. Men get publicly shamed and outed.… Continue Reading

Fire & Fury by Michael Wolff: Judging A Book By Its Cover

In the light of the completely fictional book by Michael Wolff, ‘Fire and Fury’, which is about Donald Trump’s White House and where nothing appears to be taken from any fact whatsoever, we thought we would write a totally and heavily… Continue Reading

Happy New Year to You All!

Now that the Gregorian Calendar has literally turned a new page from 2017 to 2018, with the clock and bell toll already striking us into a New Year by now. We thought that this would a good time to aptly… Continue Reading

A Very (Early) Merry Christmas Greeting From Brainstain News

Well, hello everyone! This, if you didn’t already know, is our second Christmas with you all, and so we’re spreading the “Christmas Cheer” far and wide again this year, sending out love, positive vibes, and some Christmas advice to all… Continue Reading